• • The infamous raid at the Biltmore on 1 October 1928 is dramatized via a backstage visit to Mae's dressing room at the Royale Theatre, as the actress prepares to go onstage as the diamond-draped Bowery queen and consort of mobster Gus Jordan.• • "Courting Mae West" is seeking a co-producer and backers for a for-profit production.
• • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • •
• • "Courting Mae West" — — excerpt from ACT II, Scene 1 • •
• • • MAE WEST
That you, Jim?
• • • TEXAS GUINAN (TEXAS, age 44, enters MAE’s room clad in furs and diamonds)
The “butter and egg man” sent me, angel-pie.
• • • MAE WEST
The speakeasy hostess film-star herself! Still shooting in Flatbush? How’s it rolling, Texas?
• • • TEXAS GUINAN
It’s top-hat heavy. There’s a comical danse macabre with a District Attorney and a Judge.
• • • MAE WEST
Legal beagles! Don’t spoil my mood. Backers shouldn’t come backstage. It’s unlucky.
• • • TEXAS GUINAN
Pat from Variety visited the set of Queen of the Night Clubs. I steered her to your show tonight.
• • • MAE WEST
Oy! Variety’s always given me a black eye in print. They get my knickers in a knot.
• • • TEXAS GUINAN
This chick is a FAN. Pat admires the up-from-nothing Fellatio Alger characters in your plays.
• • • MAE WEST
My stomach’s full of “opening night” butterflies. Got enough congrats to wallpaper with.
(MAE shows TEXAS telegrams that arrived via Western Union)• • • TEXAS GUINAN (TEXAS examines the telegrams)
• • • MAE WEST (MAE puts on stage jewelry for her role as the star of Diamond Lil)
Bet it warms Pat’s heart — to sit with you, basking in the glow of your investment-grade jewelry.
• • • TEXAS GUINAN
We would’ve had yuks. (pause) But you’ll be busy tonight — a little grape told me as it whined.
• • • MAE WEST
The Bowery Queen here is about to go on! Diamonds is my career…. NIX the BAD NEWS!
• • • TEXAS GUINAN
You need to know! Before he left for D.C., our Mayor gave his okay for a raid — at the Biltmore.
• • • MAE WEST (MAE is outraged and jumps out of her seat)
WHAT! It’s our opening night at the Biltmore! Tex, who told you there’ll be a raid tonight?
• • • TEXAS GUINAN
Walter Winchell doesn’t call me the gatekeeper of gossip for nothing.
• • • MAE WEST
Pleasure Man has a $200,000 advance. Who wants to sink my ship on its maiden voyage?
• • • TEXAS GUINAN
It’s pressure from the Prevention of Vice cranks. They’d convict the 12 apostles, if they could.
• • • MAE WEST
Convict! Stop with the unlucky words. My mother suffered when they jailed me last year.
• • • TEXAS GUINAN
I’ve learned to see the sunny side. Prison is one place where my diamonds seem safe.
• • • MAE WEST
Sunny! My trial ate my bankbook. I wanted to buy my parents a house. Now another raid!
• • • TEXAS GUINAN
Scandal is a career move. This time play the damsel in distress on the witness stand.
• • • MAE WEST
Mae West doesn’t do PATHETIC. (pause) Tex, what can be done to trouble-shoot this?
• • • TEXAS GUINAN
Honey-child, the problem with trouble-shooting is that, invariably, trouble shoots back.
• • • MAE WEST
Aww! My butterflies just went into battle formation. Diamond Lil goes on in thirty minutes.
• • • TEXAS GUINAN
Relax. You’ll get fried on the front page and it’ll boost your box office higher than a zeppelin.
• • • MAE WEST
Our Biltmore premier was sold out. An injunction can keep the show on — maybe. (MAE exits, bad posture revealing her agony from stomach cramps)
• • • TEXAS GUINAN
Never met a chick who was hurt by a headline. Give the little girl a nice big (pause) handcuff. (TEXAS exits with great style)
• • • • • • [LIGHTS: dim lights in MAE’s dressing room, Royale Theatre]
— — Excerpt: — —
• • • © "Courting Mae West: Sex, Censorship, and Secrets" by LindaAnn Loschiavo
• • • This play is protected under U.S. copyright law.
• • • NO permission is being given to duplicate this text anywhere else. Thank you.
• • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • •• • Come up and see Mae every day online: http://MaeWest.blogspot.com/________
Source:http://maewest.blogspot.com/atom.xml
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Mae West• • Photo: • • Mae West • • none • •• • Feed — — http://feeds2.feedburner.com/MaeWest
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