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• • Mae West held out her hand to me.
As I took it, I scratched my palm on one of her diamond rings. All of her fingers were covered with diamonds. These, she explained, were just her "daytime diamonds". Holding out her hands, she said, "They're all real. They were given to me by admirers." Her gaze settled on my unadorned hands. "Oh, you poor kid! You don't have any!"• • For a moment she regarded me with pity. Then she brightened. "But you have some at home?"
• • I shook my head.
• • Mae West studied me, then said encouragingly, "You could, honey. But you've gotta try, and you've gotta know how to try. Knowing what you want is the first step toward getting it. There's nothing better in life than diamonds."
• • Mae West had been giving no interviews at all. She already knew all the people she wanted to know, especially in light of the hours she felt compelled to spend on hair, makeup, and dress before she could see anyone. I had cost her three hours, but it would have been double that if I had been a man. If she were going to see anyone at all, a man would have been preferable any day, and especially any night.
• • "They always sent a man," she told me, not specifying who "they" were. "I considered spending my time with girls a waste of time, so I didn't mingle with any." The only exceptions were her beloved mother and her sister.
• • For Mae West, Hollywood had real unreality, and that was the way she liked it. To the end, she nobly resisted any assault on her fairytale castle. The apartment in Hollywood's Ravenswood was truly an extension of Mae West. The furniture was upholstered in eggshell white silk and satin, and appeared virginal, as if it had just been moved in for my visit. Once Mae had achieved perfection by her own standards, she hated any change. The celebrations of herself on display throughout the apartment evinced no false modesty. They also signified that in her mid-80s she was not afraid to be in competition with her younger self.
• • Whenever Mae interjected one of her celebrated epigrams to make a point, she would change from a serious tone to the sultry flippancy of Diamond Lil. As she spoke, her sculpted platinum hair would swing as in a shampoo commercial.
• • Perhaps she didn't like to give interviews to women because she couldn't act her part. Mae West had to be there herself; she couldn't just send Diamond Lil. She pointed out that although she was Diamond Lil, Lil was not Mae because there was more to Mae West.
• • Mae gave me a hard look and said there was something to tell me before we "got into it."
• • "If you smoke," she said, "you'll have to leave the room. I don't let anyone smoke in my presence."
• • I assured her that this wouldn't be necessary. Her approving look indicated that I had passed an important test.
• • "Then you'll keep your soft skin. That's how I kept mine. I always use baby oil. But the secret is it has to be warm, and you have to have a man put it on you — — all over."
• • Her next query had the same tone of entrapment as the smoking suggestion. She asked if I wanted a drink. I declined. She said it was a good thing because she didn't have any liquor.
"I never understood drinking. It isn't good for your looks, and it cuts down on what you are. I never wanted to cut down on what I am.
• • "I was indefatigable. They only just found out that I had a double thyroid. Always had it, but didn't know it. Maybe that's the source of my energy, especially my sex energy. Is that scarf because you're cold, or do you have something to hide?"
• • I take it off.
• • "That's better. Now, unbutton a few buttons. Men like it if you show them a thing or two. I dress for women and undress for men.
• • "When I was making a film, I would stand during the whole shooting so I wouldn't wrinkle my dress. I'd say, 'Do I want to look my best for my public that expects it of me? Or would I rather sit down?' That ain't no choice.
• • "First impressions are what count. It's like when you arrive at a party. That's when people take a real look at you, and if they're impressed, that's how they think of you. If your makeup fades and you get creases in your dress later, that isn't what they remember."
• • What would you do if you didn't make the best first impression on a man?
• • Get a different man. I'd figure there was something wrong with him. I never needed clothes to make me feel sexy. I felt that way all the time. The nearness of an attractive man kept me in a constant state of sensual unrest.
• • You summed it up at the end of I'm No Angel when Cary Grant asked you, "What are you thinking about?" and you answered, "The same thing you are."
• • That's very exciting for a man. When men sense a woman is ready for sex, they're ready right away. When men came to see me, I had to try to calm them down a little first. [Sighing] I had a lot of great love affairs. Sex and work have been the only two things in my life.
• • In reverse order of importance.
• • Yeah. If I had to choose between sex and work, it was always my work I'd choose. I'm glad I didn't ever have to choose between them for more than a week, though. Since I was grown up, I've never been without either for more than a week. . . .
— — excerpt — —
• • The Ultimate Seduction by Charlotte Chandler [N.Y.: Doubleday, 1984]
• • Come up and see Mae every day online: http://MaeWest.blogspot.com/
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Mae West
• • Photo: • • Mae West • • surrounded by fans and the press • •
NYC
Mae West.
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